Jaymz

My First Felony

I am a thug.

And I steal stuff.

Because that is what thugs do.

Us thugs are hardcore.

 

Nah I'm just kidding….. Even thought I am pretty hardcore.

So I went to my Daddy's favorite place in the entire world last Saturday night after church. Walmart. Found a new clock for my room… got some new nose rings….. grabbed a few other things that I needed. Oh! And I tried on a pair of sun glasses. As Jes and I were leaving, the alarm at the door went off. The dude who checks receipts and compares them to the items in your bag responded immediately…. Well my receipt was in total agreement with the contents of my bag. This is because what set off the alarm was not in my bag……

When I got home….. Something was irritating my forehead….. I reached up to remove the intruding object…. It was a price tag!!!!

In my mist of trying on different pairs of glasses, one was forgotten and left on my head….. I felt sooooooooo bad. For reals.

I have never stolen a thing in my entire life! L except sunglasses….

I really am a good kid!

 

Rest assured that I DID pay for them. I took them back to Walmart and paid the whopping $10.80. I didn't have the heart or the guts to say that I didn't want them… especially since I had already stolen them and taken them to my house once…. I am now the owner of a previously stolen pair of white sunlasses…

Stealing is bad. Say no to stealing.

Babysitting: Crumbs are living organisms..... I know this because they can multiply on their own...

    I have a job these days!!!! I am a full-time babysitter. I know. Scary.

I nanny my two little cousins:

Meet Koi and Si:

 

They are great fun. Koi (right) is 7 and Silas (left) is 5.

and they are both filled to the brim with energy.

I have learned lots and lots this summer through this new job of mine. I am gaining insights that usually are not realized until motherhood. Some of which are superficial:

• Bread crumbs are actually living organisms. I know this because the boys are not allowed to eat in my car.... and somehow crumbs appear in the cushions of my back seat and they multiply.
• If you ever want to figure out which cars in the parking lot are the ones that frequently transport children, look at the windows. The windows of my beloved Speedracer (toyota 4runner) are currently sporting this season's newest look: fingerprints, handprints, toeprints, footprints, and even tounge prints! What on earth possesses a kid to lick it? Does my window look tasty? I don't know...
• Children must be more flexible than a worm... because they are able to get stains and dirt and just general juvenile grime is some very hard-to-reach places.... You know. The places that amazingly become messy, but when it comes time to clean up.... it is unreachable!!!
• Kids, especially boys, find humor in some of the most simple things. Things like:

            -saying "Yes, Sir" instead of the required "Yes, Ma'am".

            -replying to any simply instruction with "No thanks, but I'd rather eat tacos!" (Seriously people,I couldn't right this stuff!)

            -Poop. It's funny. ALWAYS.

        

• Everyday is opposite day. all children know this, but adults are never let in on this secret.
• Mac'n'Cheese can be their favorite food one day, and the next day it is considered a vile substance.
• Disney's Toy Story is most likely a true story on the count of toys really do come alive and run away. (Considering the boys' toy-sacrificing rituals that take place every year during firework season every year..... I'm not so sure that i blame them...)
• The teenage babysitters that consider mornings to be a cruel joke will always be paired with the children who wake up befor 7 on a regular basis. FOR NO REASON.

I love my boys :) And I love the time that I get to spend with them. We are on an adventure :)

Stick around to read what else I learn from them.... and it won't all be goofy funny things. Some of it is some pretty deep stuff.